April 7, 2010 My Man
I love that man of mine. Alan is like no other man out there. He makes me laugh, makes me cry (in a good way.) He is even aggravating, but in a way that only a best friend can be. You know the kind. The friend that loves you despite of who you are (or what you are like.) We have been through so much over the many years we have been together since high school. The thing I absolutely, hands down love the most about him is his unquenchable, passionate, fresh, living love for the Word of God. That love spills over into so many areas of his life, but also into my own.
Last night we had a little “time reality check.” We were flipping through the channels and came across an early Ewan McGregor movie. So we were talking about how old it was. He told me it came out in the early 90’s, and I replied how it was almost 20 years old. We laid there in bed discussing how it has been almost 20 years since he graduated from high school. He said, “no wonder all my students were born the year I graduated.”
Which brings me back to my point. Today he was honored by the student body, along with 6 other faculty and staff, for outstanding work. Besides the gratitude that we feel for this honor, it means so much more to me. It is another reason for us to revel in the greatness of God.
A year ago (2008) was one of the hardest years for Alan on a professional and personal level. Without going into to many details, it was a very dark time that he questioned God’s purposes. We all go through these times, and I think it is so important to be honest with God. (I LOVE the book of Habakkuk for this theme.) There are times we question, “why, God, does it seem like everyone around me is blessed, but I am left in a dry desert?” or, “why is the injustice of the wicked prevail, but the righteous suffer.” This is a closer summary of Habakkuk.
God is bigger than our circumstances. He is bigger than our troubles. He can handle our doubts, and he delights in our honesty because it opens the door for us to hear him. This was what last year was like for Alan. A dark time of wondering why he felt useless to God. After much time the Lord answered his pleas.
Today, for me, was seeing the conclusion or answer to a that year’s time of trial. God’s answer to “why?” came this year with a loud and clear, “I haven’t forgotten. I am still using you.” Thank you OBU students who have been so kind to honor Alan with this recognition.
Similarly, the book of Habakkuk concludes this way:
Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, YET I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights.”