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According to Us

One Husband, One Wife, Five Children and Everything in Between

Jesse Tree day 15

For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
Of the greatness of his government and peace
there will be no end.
He will reign on David’s throne
and over his kingdom,
establishing and upholding it
with justice and righteousness
from that time on and forever.
The zeal of the Lord Almighty
will accomplish this. -Isaiah 9:6-7

I think it’s safe to say that probably everyone is familiar with these verses. Thanks to Handel, we not only know these verses but can say them with great enthusiasm and song.

Isaiah once again is writing a prophecy of the Savior to come. This was written most likely after the fall of the Northern Kingdom. Judah is all that remains of the Chosen people.  Darkness and fear are natural reactions for us when there is great loss. It can be so powerful that normal reasoning does not bring reassurance and the darkness closes in with each breath.

I have often held to the belief in my own life that the opposite thing to fear is faith. Fear is what grips us when we don’t have answers. Fear wraps itself tightly around our hearts when we are faced with great trials. After my father was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer a couple of years ago I realized that is not completely true.

I KNEW that God was in control. I KNEW that good or bad, my dad would be exactly where he was supposed to. I would quote promises to myself from scripture. I wouldn’t say that my faith was shaken, so much as it was proven. Could I still continue this walk of life no matter what happened?

It wasn’t until I felt the peace of Christ that my fears began to fade. I wrestled with my fears and faith. We were a great mess of emotions. The struggle was real. I could feel depression taking over my body. I wanted to shake my fist at God and tell him how unfair it was, but I knew 1. that wasn’t true, and 2. how ridiculous I was being. I was acting like a child who wasn’t getting her way and was going to “make God pay.” All the while I never felt any better.

One day, I finally let go. I realized that I wanted to control it, even though absolutely none of it was in my control. I wanted my parents to move here and fond treatments. I wanted all of the cancer gone. I wanted to feel like I could do something, anything. This whole time I was praying and seeking answers from Him. I wanted to land with my feet firm on what I believed about God. I didn’t want what I “thought” to be right, but that who he is to come through my fear and pain.

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7

Jesse Tree day 16

I came to a point that I could quit my belly aching, and instead praise God. It was like the callous fell off my heart, and in its place I was changed. I would accept whatever happened. If the cancer won the battle, God was still enthroned on high. But if, somehow, my dad came through this with the battle of cancer under his belt- all the more!

It’s hard to believe that my dad has been cancer free for over 2 years. He didn’t have surgery, had very little sickness while under the treatments, and is alive today. His doctors have all said, “how is it that you have done so well?” he always gives full glory to God. I think one of the reasons this was so hard for me was because I had a friend whose husband also had throat cancer. Several times he came close to dying. In no way do I think that my dad’s “easier” treatments or my friends harder treatments are because of God’s favor. Although I believe that prayer does amazing things, who are we to question why bad things happen to good people.

God is unchanging. He is constant and true. He is the Prince of Peace no matter the situation or circumstance. When life is easy and comfortable, his peace is still there with us. However it’s not until the most difficult of life’s storm that we can really sense and know the peace of God.

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27

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